Liking you was kinda my anchor, giving m

Liking you was kinda my anchor, giving me something to work for...
But.. But hey.. It's fine. I swear. I swear to god... I'm lying. I'm
lying. But that's fine. I swear.

December 5th 09 11:26pm

I'm fine. And I mean it. It's cool, hot, either way. I'm just normal
plain old not feeling anything saskia. Helllloooo brother

Decemeber 6th 09 10:01

Ahhh it been awhile since I wrote, so much new stuff... Tell you about
it later. My journal already knows. ;)

Decemeber 14th 09 9:42

That feeling where you sit and are comfortable. Nothing can move you
from your place, that's what I feel. Solid.

But, out of everyone, I think I know the most, that I of all, need to
be the one bleeding on the floor. It's way past due for a break down,
an a place to pull up. But, that means pushing, proding, and probably
the most painful, remembering. So I'll start tonight, so soon, an just
fully crumble, because I need it. An deserve it. And I don't want
anyone to pick me up. Or touch me. I want to do it myself as long as
possible. I want it to be a night I'm awake till 4 and up at 7. I want
it to be a night where I sleep to music. I want it to be a night full
of tears. I want it to be a night with my ihome in my bed. And of all
things, I want it to be a night where the tub is stained/ red/

I have everything I "want" and I am "happy". But that's not true. And
I think; maybe thisill help, because after thinking of one memory then
shutting down, that is doing nothing. And it's been destroying
everything I actually love<3

Call me Christmas day Mackenzie, I want to talk to you

December 23, 2009 9:15 am

Sent from my iPod